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Tits McGee
15 March 2011 @ 08:56 pm
Dropping by to say three things:

ONE! Ugh, I've been so regrettably absent, you guys, I'm sorry. If you're on my friendslist, I'll explain details in a locked post later, but for the general public, I am attempting to be an adult more and that means figuring out how to be creative and make money, and it is highly exhausting. I still read you all! I just am like UGH AND NOW I HAVE TO WRITE AN LJ POST? FUCK THAT NOISE.

TWO! New default icon! Because Alberto Vargas loved redheads, and I love him.

THREE! Bradley James is on twitter! My feelings can be described in the following manner:



If I don't have at least one picture of Angel/Katie/Colin making a GTFO face at him or various blurred falling limbs that are posted within the time of filming (probably with the caption "guess who didn't want their photo taken!") or like a bazillion of him and his knights in various herp derp poses, I will both a) surprised and b) DEEPLY DISAPPOINTED. DON'T LET ME DOWN, MY FAVORITE PUPPY WHOSE WISH WAS GRANTED AND GOT TURNED INTO A REAL BOY.

(Also, this should go without saying but fandom? Be cool. He's a real person with real feelings, and he's allowed to have a private life, just like we are allowed to, in our corners of the internet, create self-indulgent fiction in regards to said private life. And while I (obviously) am a huge fan of private speculation, it doesn't need to be shoved in his face. I mean, you could, but why would you? Does it actually achieve anything besides making everyone involved uncomfortable? Not really. So just... don't be a douche.)
 
 
Tits McGee
I INTERRUPT MY SEMI-HIATUS FOR A VERY IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT.

THIS EXISTS:



FUCK NO I AM NOT PUTTING THAT BEHIND AN LJ CUT. DEAL WITH IT. DEAL WITH BRADLEY'S ADORABLE FACE HOLDING THAT SCRIPT AND DEAL WITH IT GOOD.

AND NOW BACK TO HOMEWORK AND CLUTCHING MY UTERUS IN AGONY.
 
 
Tits McGee
28 February 2011 @ 06:52 pm
Sorry my presence has been so spotty lately, you guys. I've been absent a lot lately because my depression/anxiety really exploded in the last few weeks. In good news, though, I'm on new medication (today is day 4) that seems to be working really well, so, hi again! I have been reading everything you've been writing, just not up to writing a lot. (Though I have been tumbling, which is because all you really have to do is hit "reblog" and then maybe write a paragraph of text. My latest masterpiece of language there was describing my longing for a dessert as "Dickensian".)

Aaaanyway, in spite of that, several boys (and one inanimate thing) that have been making me feel fabulous, so I think we should celebrate them!

Tom Hardy: Okay, I know everyone and their mother has seen this interview, but really, does anyone object to seeing it again? I THOUGHT NOT.



Between this and the utterly magnificent Benedict Cumberbatch interview he did, I've decided Alan Carr is my new hero. Also, Tom Hardy, please report to my house, I have some cookies to feed you. (What is it about Tom Hardy that makes me get all grandmotherly and sigh things like "SUCH A NICE YOUNG MAN"?!?! IDK YOU GUYS.)

Also, re: the rising star BAFTA grudge between him/Andrew Garfield - I wasn't mad then, and I'm still not mad now. I mean, this is why I didn't vote, besides that I'm not British, because they are both stupidly adorable and there are pictures of them on the internet holding babies and they both have big puppy eyes and crinkly smiles and rescue lost kittens (in Tom's case, literal, in Andrew's case, I mean Jesse Eisenberg) and seriously, HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO CHOOSE. I CAN'T. I'm sure Andrew Garfield and Tom Hardy will both end up with fantastic roles later in their careers, win and be nominated for squidgillions of awards, and cause us much joy in our hearts and/or pants for many years to come. HEH. COME.

Colin Morgan: There are a flobbityjillion Colin Morgan things coming out because of his new play, and I assure you I have been squealing my head off over them all. WHO ARE YOU, COLIN MORGAN, AND HOW ARE YOU A REAL BOY. Like, seriously, can his mother please teach a class on How To Raise Your Children To Be That Polite And Gracious And Darling? BECAUSE I WANT TO KNOW. And oh, he's just the prettiest boy in the world. I use the word prettiest very pointedly, I don't think he's like, the hottest or sexiest or most attractive in that sort of FIRE OF MY LOINS way, but by god, he's just so beautiful. HOW IS HE SO BEAUTIFUL. Like there are no bad angles on all those new stage door shots! None! He looks so lovely in all of them! It is a supernatural power. And I may be biased because in many of them he's wearing a Boston Red Sox beanie, and the number one way for any famous person to have my undying devotion is for them to cart around Red Sox paraphernalia. (See also: why I can never hate you, Ben Affleck.)

SPEAKING OF COLIN MORGAN AND BOSTON, I think I regretfully am not going to the screening of Parked that's going to be here. I was hemming and hawing all day yesterday, and I think I would have changed my mind if Colin was going to be there for a Q & A session or something (so I could shake his hand, thank him for being brilliant, and humbly request that next he do, like, a romcom or something, damn), but the fact is, I have a literal physical reaction to seeing Colin Morgan hurt or upset.

Well, okay, I have a physical reaction to seeing anyone hurt or upset unless I feel a strong disconnection of knowing they're acting. But there are certain actors (like Colin or Bradley or, and this is the one that's the worst for me, Joe) where I get too emotionally invested in their emotional well-being. I don't know why it happens with some actors and not others (there are plenty of actors I love love love and never have this problem with, like, I've been a giant Tom Hanks fan since I was very little, but it never bothers me when I see him acting hurt, and Tom Hardy I have no issue with either and we all know my deep grandmotherly feelings on him... maybe it's something with people named Tom?), but it's BAD with Colin. I can't even get through the trailer of Parked without feeling nauseous and my chest starting to tighten. It makes my throat close up and my palms start sweating to watch the end of The Lady of the Lake episode. OF MERLIN. Even after Arthur noogies him! I just can't deal with it. And I think seeing Colin Morgan get beat up and overdose on drugs on the big screen would just... it would be bad for my emotional health. Along the lines of when I was made to watch the tapes from the original Millgram experiments in AP Psych. That was a terrible idea. i was literally almost in class and shaking and everyone was like "SO I THINK WE KNOW WHO THE STATISTICAL OUTLIER IS".

Scott Caan: alkdsjflksdjf THIS MAN IS ADORABLE. Like, the hair is still worrying to me but apparently it's his thing, so whatever. The point is that I am in love with his nose and crinkly eyes and his polka dot socks omg they are the greatest. There's also a video where he's with his girlfriend and her dog and his daddy and he's adorable, my only complaint is really that FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, SCOTT, WHY DO YOU ALWAYS HAVE GUM IN YOUR MOUTH? SPIT IT OUT, YOUNG MAN. JESUS.

Whichever Genius Made This: creativepseudo sent me a link to this NES-style game of the Great Gatsby which is THE MOST NERDY AMAZING THING THAT HAS HAPPENED TO MY UNIVERSE FOR THE LAST MONTH OR SO.

Though I can't get past the level with the giant eyes, so... help?

Fuzzy Boys:

HELLO, OUR NAMES ARE CHARLIE AND GUS, AND WE ARE ADORABLE. WE HAVE BEEN MOSTLY WELL BEHAVED, EXCEPT FOR GUSGUS, WHO KEEPS CRAWLING IN THE BACK OF THE COUCH, WHICH MEANS MAMA IS NOT HAPPY AND LETTING HIM RUN, WHICH MEANS GUSGUS IS UNHAPPY, SO MAMA HAS ORDERED US A WHEELY WHEEL, WHICH WE WILL RUNRUNRUNRUNRUN ON. ALSO, CHARLIE HAS LEARNED TO JUMP OUT OF THE CAGE, BUT HE LIKES TO CRAWL UP THE WATER BOTTLES AND STAND ON THE SIDE OF THE CAGE INSTEAD OF INTO MAMA'S LAP, BECAUSE HE IS SILLY.

YESTERDAY WE WERE VERY EXCITED DURING THE OSCARS, ESPECIALLY THE PRE-SHOW. ALSO, WE SMELL LIKE COFFEE BECAUSE MAMA GAVE US A BAG THAT USED TO HOLD COFFEE GROUNDS.

IN CONCLUSION, WE WOULD LIKE CUDDLES, PLEASE. ALSO, ALL OF YOUR EGG CARTONS.

SINCERELY, YOUR FUZZY OVERLORDS
 
 
Tits McGee
Blergh. I have been feeling a little under the weather and consequently not had the best of weeks, which is why I propose we ignore than and instead focus on SIX THINGS THAT MAKE ME REALLY SUPER HAPPY:

ONE: puckling sent me a link to this game called Entanglement which I am ALL SORTS OF OBSESSED WITH and seriously, best timesuck ever. It took me less than 24 hours of playing to start screencapping when I did well and e-mailing her with attachments entitled HAHASUCKIT.jpg. Because I am a mature human being.

TWO: There is a new mouser at 10 Downing! If you understand why I find this so exciting, congrats, chances are you are in the Merlin fandom. If you do not understand, it's a long, fic-related story, but it can also be summed up by CAT IN ENGLAND HOLDS GOVERNMENT POSITION: COUNTRY REMAINS AWESOME IF SLIGHTLY STRANGE AND INBRED.

THREE: Not only is Colin Morgan the prettiest tortured boy in the world, but alksjdflksdj this account of him dealing with autograph scalpers. BE MORE ADORABLE, MY DARLING, I DARE YOU.

FOUR: Speaking of things I want from England, I am in desperate need of owning this commemorative William & Kate condoms for reasons of sheer hilarity, but I cannot figure out how to explain the credit card charge to my mother. BUT I NEED THEM. AUGH CONUNDRUMS.

Though seriously, the website is pretty lulzy enough all on its own.

FIVE: It's really a good thing I'm not famous and going to the Oscars, because now I'm all torn because it's fashion week again and jeebus cripes, but I do love Monique Lhuillier collection. Especially the dress pictured on the bottom left. SO MANY GREEK-INSPIRED DRESSES I WANT TO WEAR, SO LITTLE TIME.

SIX: MY GERBILS ARE SUPER-CUTE. That's the part that makes me happy. The part that makes me unhappy is that apparently one of you has been giving Gusgus secret ninja training skills, because he managed to sneak out of the cage even when I was watching, without my knowledge. I kept thinking I heard him, but I'd been up all night fretting over one thing or another and I was exhausted,so I figured it was just me being paranoid again when I swore I heard his paws, since I thought I had seen him in the cage, and so I laid down for an hour and a half nap. Only when I woke up, I still thought I heard him, so I checked the cage again and surprise! It wasn't Gus, it was a shadow. Gus had found the way to crawl inside the couch through the hole in the back and had to be lured out by avocado. He's now on strict probation and only allowed couch runs in shot bursts under my extreme supervision, which is making him a little cranky. BUT THAT IS WHAT YOU GET FOR MAKING YOUR MAMA WORRY, GUSGUS. SUCK IT UP.

It does, however, make for an awesome story in retrospect.
 
 
Tits McGee
16 February 2011 @ 01:34 pm
So there was a giant tumblr meme going around where you genderswap cast shows/movies/what have you. Which is, by the way, both fun and way harder than it looks. I say this because I hadn't seen anyone do a Community genderswap (though I did, in the process of making this, get linked to two, oops), so I decided to take it on.

A week and a half later, it's done, and it was hard. My massive, massive heartfelt thank you goes to falulatonks, who gave me a million ideas, put up with my whining, and was pretty much the best ever.

Caring about a person can be scary. Caring about six people can be a horrifying, embarrassing nightmare, at least for me. But if I can’t say it today, when can I say it? I love you guys. Oh, and Pierce, take it from an expert. These knuckleheads are right outside your heart. Let them in before it’s too late.Collapse )
 
 
 
 
Tits McGee
27 January 2011 @ 07:31 pm
Ugh, time to kill until work. I should be writing this short essay that I've been working on that actually has some promise, except I'm too bored to write. Have I mentioned Too Bored To Write feeling before? BECAUSE IT IS THE WORST AND I HATE IT. SO! I am now going to share with you the mishmash of links I have acquired, and you're going to entertain me in my comments section, and you will enjoy it, goddamn.

Excellent spam! Includes pretty dresses, memes, and a kitten and a puppy in love with each other.Collapse )
 
 
Tits McGee
So, this happened:



chibirhm: I LOVE BRITISH PEOPLE
puckling: THEY ARE A LOVELY NATION IT IS TRUE
chibirhm: They're just like TRA LA LA SEXUALITY WOT
puckling: I LIKE TO THINK THEY ALL SAY THIS WHILE DRINKING TEA WITH THEIR PINKIES STUCK OUT
chibirhm: EXACTLY
chibirhm: I LOVE THAT EVERY BRITISH PERSON I'VE TALKED TO
chibirhm: CARES NOT A WHIT ABOUT WHAT A MAN DOES WITH HIS PENIS
chibirhm: BUT IS DEADLY SERIOUS ABOUT DIGESTIVES
puckling: AND WHEN THE MILK SHOULD GO IN
puckling: THIS IS APPARENTLY AN IMPORTANT THING ABOUT TEA
chibirhm: THEIR PRIORITIES = MY PRIORITIES
chibirhm: OR SHOULD I SAY
chibirhm: PRIORI-TEAS
chibirhm: HYUCK HYUCK HYUCK
chibirhm: ...you're pretending not to know me anymore, aren't you?
puckling: yes
puckling: it was the Hyucks that did it
 
 
Tits McGee
(JULIA walks into kitchen rubbing stomach and pouting, brow furrowed.)
Dad: Hey kiddo, what's wrong?
Julia: My uterus hurts.
Dad: I'm sorry.
Julia: I just don't see the point. Why can't I just yank it out and agree to adopt children?
Dad: (Obviously thinking he's clever) Yes, but then what would you fill that hole with?
Julia: ...Candy.

Get on that, universe.

Ugh. Seriously, though, bad timing to get my period, universe, I have writing I need to do. Couldn't you have moved it up a week? All of last week my to-do list consisted of endless brainless tasks that could easily have been done while curled in the fetal position. I can't write about the shooting in Arizona or work on my short story (I thought up something that might actually be publishable, glory hallelujah holy crap!) or create a back-and-forth argument column with co-worker on why Kono is a total feminist and not just Obligatory Hot Girl Cop. (She says otherwise. Psh! Bitches, do not try to school me on feminism. I had Feminist Trading Cards when I was little. No joke! It was like a deck of cards my mom got me that was called "fearless historical females" or something that had a picture on one side and a mini-biography on the other. I just refer to them, however, as Feminist Trading Cards. Also, they would have been much more interesting if they had Mary Wollenscroft's batting average.)

Fun new discovery of the weekend, though - did you know if, instead of slathering your toast in butter, you spread about two spoonfuls of avocado on your toast, it tastes just as buttery and delicious? I thought it was only mildly better for you than butter, but when I asked my mom (who is so neurotic about health food you have no idea) she told me that was great because "it's the good kind of fat". I like that argument. I plan on using it the next time my mom is like "You're eating too many cookies!" Instead I will be like "But it's the good kind of fat, Mom!" and she'll be like "How do you know?" and I'll be like "Because it tastes delicious."

I love how this entry is full of so much irrefutable logic.
 
 
Tits McGee
03 January 2011 @ 12:05 pm
Ugh, it's the worst day of the year, aka, the first day back from the holidays where you sit down to write your to-do list of all that shit you've been putting off because fuck it, it was the holidays, and realize how much you have to do and how much it sucks. My list mostly involves making lots of frustrating phone-tag calls to people I don't really want to have to call in the first place because I know the answers they're going to give me are going to spawn about eight more things I have to do, doing chores I've been putting off forever (picking up messes, various stages of laundry, dishes), and fussing over a short story idea I had that was (gasp) in no way related to fandom, and therefore may be actually publishable or shareable with my parents, who always say they want to read my fanfiction, but who I have completely banned from doing so, because as much as no boundaries exist in my family, there are a few, dude. Really.

Oh, the glamorous life of a part-time blogger, part-time student, full-time writer who will probably end up being so poor I live with my parents until I die because I am struggling with my "craft".

On the plus side, CBS in all their infinite wisdom is immediately jumping back into Hawaii 5-0 episodes with none of this January hiatus madness. Of course this means a long, painful hiatus later (god I am so obnoxious to be around when I'm cranky, can someone punch me?), but for now let's focus on the awesome - ten hours until a new episode which, by virtue of being an episode of Hawaii 5-0, will be chock full of badassery and homoeroticism - two of my favorite things in the world! Also, A NOTE TO ANYONE WHO WATCHES HAWAII 5-0 LIVE DURING EASTERN STANDARD TIME - want to livechat with me? I have AIM and GChat and it involves a lot of keymashing, inability to turn off my capslock, and snarky one-liners. GOOD TIMES. LET ME KNOW IF YOU ARE UP FOR IT.

Speaking of gayness and Hawaii, Scott and Alex, what are you doing. What, what, what are you doing. Buying surfboards together?! Could you be any more married? I'm trying to refrain from further delving into RPS, but when you go surfboard shopping together in addition to all your other various shenanigans, it makes it very difficult for my brain to take, okay?

And now, to do dishes. Woo... hoo. Though before I go - for those of you wondering, last night, even though I was tired and didn't want to? Brushed my teeth. Like a boss.